society, you sly dog.

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let’s talk about sex, shall we?

specifically, the societal construct of the  “lady in the streets, freak in the sheets” precept. society is a real slick rick, creating intrigue around this famed paradoxical woman, when really it is just another method of control.

as women, there is a certain level of duality that society would like you to possess. and if you possess this duality, it ups your value. men will want you, because you will not bring them shame in public but will be lascivious in the confines of the home. women will admire you because men want you, you are demure and sensual. don’t believe me? look at BEYONCE’S public image.

the duplexity of being ladylike in public and naughty in private in order for men to find you desirable lends itself to a few questions:
1.  is heteronormativity the only way to achieve the elusive duality?
2. what about women who aren’t sexual? is their value diminished?
3. what about being a lady in the sheets and caring for a lover’s desires vs. simply being insatiable?
4. why is a woman who is sexually empowered to be feared?

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a woman should be able to own her version of sexuality, wherever on the spectrum it may fall, whether she be prone to asexuality or nymphomania. as long as a woman is aware her actions affect others, she isn’t spreading any nasties or hurting innocents, can we all just live without putting ourselves in a cage?

i propose we all just be proud of our sexuality and stop giving silly sayings like this merit. all in favor say ‘aye!’.

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low-key, i admire ADINA HOWARD. she owns her sexuality and it led to this female anthem!

photos: SHAE REID

hat: free people
top: MANGO
skirt: wowfactorja
heels: STEVE MADDEN
sunnies: spitfire
pearls: family hand-me-downs and juicy couture

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boyfriend shirt

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i want to kiss the feet of whoever endorsed oversized clothing. let’s go down the list as to why oversized clothing is the way to go:

  1. you could eat all you want, and people would be none the wiser
  2. you could be wearing an adult diaper, and people would be none the wiser
  3. your lady bits can breathe
  4. you can hide food
  5. you can hide money
  6. it looks high fashion, if done right
  7. men are less likely to heckle
  8. it can be sexy without being too much

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i love oversize clothing so much, i don’t even buy my size as often as i used to. the only issue is now,  i’ve lost my REAL motivation to work out. i know, i know, i should be saying “oh, i only exercise for my health and holistic well-being.”
check this: i exercise to fit into pretty things. and now the pretty things are loose, so who needs to work out, really?

featured song TORY STYLEZ “say it”  goes so hard! 90’s lovemaking R&B meets millennial trap music 808’s. more importantly, the message is real. this girl he’s singing to seems to have an agenda – she’s a gold digger y’all! LANEZ explains to her that she’s gonna have to do more than say what he wants to hear, she has to prove and show him what she’s about. LOVE IT.

photos: SHAE REID

top: thrifted
denim: joe’s jeans
pearls: family hand-me-downs and juicy couture
flats: TOPSHOP

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the baby daddy list

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IS DATCHU BABY DADDY?!

i like to think that every woman has a carefully curated list of people that she is inexplicably drawn to/ obsessed with. so much so, that she’d want to give them her fruitful loins. DAS BABY DADDY. to give you an idea, i’ve shared my list, complete with hyperlinked visual aids, with you today.

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Daniel Henney – that voice, mesmerizing…
Chris Evans – his eyelashes are lush yo
Dave Franco– sooo funny + jawline
Michael B Jordan – what dat mouf do doh?
Broderick Hunter– jawline: check. smile: check. morals: check.
Childish Gambino -he’s a lyricist, moody  and chill AF. also, can you say multi-talented?
Charles Michael Davis – bearded, talented and humble? sign me up!
Mehcad Brooks – i mean…
Mark Wahlberg – crass humour gets me every time, plus he’s so sweet!
Dustin Brown – had to put a yahdie pon di list!

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please note that this list is subject to change. i decided to keep men that i actually know off of this list, since that would create some waves in my social life for sure. also, deductive reasoning will make you think i like artistic, humble men with beards. but i promise i’m attracted to a man’s mind more than anything else. hey, i didn’t choose, my loins did.

today’s post is inspired by one of baby daddy Childish’s bangers. I LUH YOU BABY DADDY!

photos by SHAE REID

bodysuit: MISSGUIDED
shorts: ZARA
accessories: ruby&jenna, wowfactorja, italian street market, goody hair
shoes: seychelles footwear
lippie: a-go-go and nightmoth liner

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hi. my name is _______, and…

 

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i’m a music masochist.

i like when i find that perfect song that makes me feel heartbreak all over again, or makes me come face to face with issues that cause my heart to twist with pain. 10+ points if it can make me cry.

heartbreak songs are my favourite songs to sing for that very reason. tightly wound emotions are allowed to be unleashed. it’s like feeling pain and finally being able to let out a scream you’ve been suppressing.

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but the most satisfying thing is having someone melodiously describe what you are feeling at that moment. it helps take the loneliness out of lovelorn, the pang out of desolation and the shame out of rejection. you rest easy for a while because your emotions have been finally validated- even if it hurts. especially because it hurts.

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ETTA JAMES time and time again has helped give me my fix. she is no stranger to pain. my type of girl.

photos: SHAE REID

romper: ASOS
kimono: NASTYGAL
sandals: lucky brand
necklace: j.crew
bracelet: jewelmint
lippie: NARS train bleu

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back like eczema

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just when you thought you got rid of me, i’m back on that ish like dermatitis!!!

HI GUYS! so happy to be back to blogging. as usual, i’m not that sorry i was gone. i always take a break for a reason. so there’s that.

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today’s post is all about these overalls that my high school friend gave me for me birthday (bless har ort).
at first, i was a little intimidated by them. but nah, style challenge accepted! i threw on my fave necklace, a tank and some stilettos to up the ante and *boom* i ended up channeling the goddesses that are TLC.

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now, it would be way too predictable to have a TLC song be featured here today, but we are gonna keep it in the girl group family and get it in to the dopeness that is EN VOGUE and SALT ‘N’ PEPPA. all my 90’s R&B aficionados know what’s up!

WHATTA MAN!

speaking of men, i’m not saying good men aren’t out there, but they are hard to find. however, i’ve been blessed to have some good men in my life, so whenever i sing this song i feel like i can boast too. so here’s to the exes, the coulda beens, shoulda beens, and hey, maybe even a potential spoogie**! this song’s for you all.

**not the urban dictionary meaning. the internet is so nasty sometimes lol!

photos by SHAE REID

tank: gojane
overalls: american eagle
necklace: luv aj
sunnies: karen walker
hat: amazon
heels: shoemint
hoops: shopbop

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spring…i guess.

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top – yahdie concious skirt – wow factor ja flats – deena+ozzy sunnies – spitfire necklace – swankblue lip colour – NARS dominique

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it’s finally starting to feel warm around these parts, so i’ve decided to come out of hibernation.

song of the week is by BRYSON TILLER. it’s called “don’t”. i think it’s kinda hot 😉

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breezy allure

 

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earrings - jewelmint dress - gojane body chain - amazon sandals - shoemint

earrings – jewelmint
dress – gojane
body chain – amazon
sandals – shoemint

 

 

 

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no words this time around. i’ll just leave you with this gem:

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i’m lush b*tch

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every time i come on i apologize for my absence. don’t expect an apology today, cause i’m not sorry. i have my business to tend to. i’m steady trying to get this grad paper.

 

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on to the meat of the matter:
look at God showing up and showing out in my backyard. doesn’t she look lush? when i took these pictures it had been quite a few days since we had gotten some rain but the greenery is still masterful. in fact, it was my surroundings that inspired this outfit, the shirt especially. i love how…TROPICAL it is. some people find it gaudy (hi mommy!), but to me it just screams lush tropical forest.

talk about art imitating life huh?

blouse: zara (summer sale) shorts: TOBI necklace and ring: italian street vendor pumps: ALDO sunglasses: RayBan lip color: stila stay all-day in 'fiery'

blouse: zara (summer sale)
shorts: TOBI
necklace and ring: italian street vendor
pumps: ALDO
sunglasses: RayBan
lip color: stila stay all-day in ‘fiery’

song of the week is by the Crown Prince of Reggae, DENNIS BROWN. it’s titled “love has found it’s way,” the musical arrangement of this song makes me think to coconut trees swaying in the breeze, and having a beer with friends on the beach while the sun sets. can you tell i miss home?

photos by ZOE DAWKINS

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Zoë on being internally driven

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“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

I think that used to be one of the most intimidating questions I’d ever heard back when I was 13. How the heck was I supposed to know? Back then, my biggest concern used to be what colour sneakers I should buy for P.E. However, by the time it came for me to go to university, I had grown out of my childhood fashion dilemmas and had my heart set on being a chef. I had my mother’s full support, but every other family member tried to give me an alternative. My father suggested I study interior decorating and team up with him and his architecture firm. Both sets of grandparents suggested I go into medicine, one set even said that they would send me application forms for the local college to be an X-ray technician. Other family members  and friends would always gave me the ‘ oh that’s cute’ face when I told them my dreams and goals. I was basically on my own, but you know what? Not for one second did I buckle under the pressure of doubt. I knew exactly what I wanted and I went for it.

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sunglasses – random London market jacket – zara top – boohoo leggings – boohoo booties – H&M

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In 2008, I left my little rock in the sun, Jamaica, and went to The Culinary Institute of America. Hands down the #1 culinary school on that side of the world. This is where I met one of the strongest women I know and someone who has turned out to be one of my best friends: the wonderful Dionne Reid. Ten years, numerous restaurants and 5 countries later, all the persistence and hard work has paid off. Not only can I work any section of a kitchen, but I am now training to become a restaurant manager. There were times I doubted myself, times the hours were too long, the work stress too difficult, the lack of a social life or interaction unbearable. Times I hated putting on the tough role of being the only woman in the kitchen, trying hard to stay afloat in a man’s world. I had many moments when I wanted to pack my bags and go home, give up on being so adventurous and just have a normal life. But God took me through every step of the way, over every single hurdle. He kept me focused and kept my feet planted but most importantly gave me strength. I made it through and am STILL making it through day by day.

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So the moral of my little story today is this: Never let anyone tell you you can’t do something, especially yourself.

There is a whole world out there, it seems scary but there is actually so much waiting for you to experience, to expand your knowledge and broaden your horizons. Don’t hold yourself back from anything your heart truly desires, if the passion is there a way will always be made. Never give up on yourself, don’t let people put you down, everything you go through will always pay off in the end.

Even now my grandma will still drop a line like “It’s not too late to be a doctor.” Honestly all I can do is smile when she says it because I know what my heart is set on and I know I believe in me. You can do anything you put your mind to, your biggest supporter is YOU! Once you remember that, nothing else matters. As my man Bruno says ‘ Don’t believe me just watch!!’ Every time I here this song it just gives me a burst of confidence and energy. I hope it does the same for you 🙂

 

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jumpsuit praise

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all hail the jumpsuit, the onesie’s fashionable cousin! i love a billowy jumpsuit for its ease of wear, its lack of constriction, and its breeziness. all of these these things make the jumpsuit great period wear. you know, the clothes you reluctantly slug on  when you are bloated, lethargic, cramped up and nauseous.

i love the zipper that runs down the middle of this jumpsuit. it’s like a instrument that allows you to adjust your desired level of sexiness. more boob? zip down. feeling prudish? zip up.

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these pictures of home are making me sad now, mother nature has projectile vomited snow all over boston. spring seems so far away…

sunglasses - karen walker jumpsuit - lulu's necklace - ruby & jenna's sandals - shoemint

sunglasses – karen walker
jumpsuit – lulu’s
necklace – ruby & jenna’s
sandals – shoemint

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song of the week is duffy’s ‘hanging on too long’, cuz i’m in my feelings like that.

 

photo credit: ZOE DAWKINS

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