society, you sly dog.


let’s talk about sex, shall we?

specifically, the societal construct of the  “lady in the streets, freak in the sheets” precept. society is a real slick rick, creating intrigue around this famed paradoxical woman, when really it is just another method of control.

as women, there is a certain level of duality that society would like you to possess. and if you possess this duality, it ups your value. men will want you, because you will not bring them shame in public but will be lascivious in the confines of the home. women will admire you because men want you, you are demure and sensual. don’t believe me? look at BEYONCE’S public image.

the duplexity of being ladylike in public and naughty in private in order for men to find you desirable lends itself to a few questions:
1.  is heteronormativity the only way to achieve the elusive duality?
2. what about women who aren’t sexual? is their value diminished?
3. what about being a lady in the sheets and caring for a lover’s desires vs. simply being insatiable?
4. why is a woman who is sexually empowered to be feared?


a woman should be able to own her version of sexuality, wherever on the spectrum it may fall, whether she be prone to asexuality or nymphomania. as long as a woman is aware her actions affect others, she isn’t spreading any nasties or hurting innocents, can we all just live without putting ourselves in a cage?

i propose we all just be proud of our sexuality and stop giving silly sayings like this merit. all in favor say ‘aye!’.


low-key, i admire ADINA HOWARD. she owns her sexuality and it led to this female anthem!

photos: SHAE REID

hat: free people
top: MANGO
skirt: wowfactorja
sunnies: spitfire
pearls: family hand-me-downs and juicy couture

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